… This weekend marks KAMEHAMEHA DAY 2010 with the traditional parade down Front Street with decorated floats and PA‘U riders fitted in the colors of the islands they represent. KAMEHAMEHA I was the chief who united all the islands in 1795 — except Kauai, which later came into the Kingdom via diplomacy. According to historian SCOTT C.S. STONE, “Kamehameha was the epitome of what it meant to be a Hawaiian warrior-chief — tough, adaptable, clever and ruthless. Especially important was his adaptability, for he used Western advisors and guns to complete his conquest.” So plan to honor our famous chief — parade begins at 9:45 a.m. LAHAINATOWN ACTION COMMITTEE is sponsoring the parade, chaired this year by DARYL FUJIWARA and MATTHEW ERICKSON…

… and plans are moving ahead for the Fourth of July fireworks — but not fast enough. This event is a big win-win for the town, so all you businesses out there, support the MAUI CHAMBER OF COMMERCE, who is running the event. Your donation will come back to you in spades. The chamber still has a way to go, and the price of fireworks has gone up this year…

… LAHAINA ARTS SOCIETY will face temporary closure during the makeover of the OLD LAHAINA COURTHOUSE. The building is scheduled to close on Monday, June 21, and will remain closed through July 19. As the beautiful oheo wood floors of the courthouse are restored, both LAS galleries will remain closed. But LAS will still host Fine Art Fairs during the closure. I made a mistake on this in my last column…

… and back to the parade for a moment — once again, the WHARF CINEMA CENTER will be part of the festivities. The traditional live remote broadcast will take place from the deck of COOL CAT CAFE, and the Wharf will host guitarist and singer RON HETTEEN on center stage…

… and across the pond, the oil spill has captured the attention of the entire world — absolutely frightening…

… and over the other pond to the west, North Korea is rattling the cage again with the torpedoing of a South Korean warship. But did you notice the timing? It was a couple of weeks after Kim Jong Il returned from meetings in China!!…

… and speaking of China, the Australians are downright skittish right now with the Chinese response to Aussie Premier KEVIN RUDD placing a huge tax on the export of minerals — iron ore, uranium, gold, silver, bauxite, etc. — to China. And the angry Chinese are sitting on their doorstep. Easy does it, Kevin!!!…

… and then there’s Japan with a new premier — again. Pretty soon they’ll catch up to Italy in the revolving premier door stakes!!!…

… and back at the ranch, I read where the HAWAII TOURISM AUTHORITY has launched a new Heritage Sites of Hawaii program to promote some of the state’s special places, and guess what was chosen for Maui? IAO VALLEY STATE MONUMENT — what idiot chose that? I, for one, didn’t know we had a state monument at Iao. What about the OLD LAHAINA COURTHOUSE — the seat of the first capitol of the Hawaiian Islands, built by King Kamehameha III? In fact, there are dozens of heritage sites in and around Lahaina — make your voice heard to change it. AUWE!!!…

… congratulations to LAHAINA RESTORATION FOUNDATION for a very successful Progressive Dinner. The format was changed for the better in my opinion, starting with pupus at the WO HING MUSEUM, salad at HALE ALOHA, dinner at the BALDWIN HOME and then dessert at the PIONEER INN. (There’s four heritage sites for you, Hawaii Tourism Authority!!)…

Up Front Lahaina is a twice monthly feature. To protect his innocence, the writer chooses to remain anonymous. The views expressed in this column belong to the author, and do not necessarily represent the views of the Lahaina News staff and owners.