The fifth annual Lahaina Town Cleanup will begin at 9 a.m. on Sept. 19 and span from Canoes Restaurant to Launiupoko Beach Park. Learn about the community cleanup project at a benefit today, Thursday, Sept. 10, at Lulu’s Lahaina Surf Club in Lahaina Cannery Mall from 6 to 9 p.m., to be followed by a benefit for Napili Canoe Club. Kona Brewing Company is sponsoring the event, with proceeds of beer sales benefiting the Lahaina Town Cleanup. For information, e-mail coordinator Matt Lane at m_lane@hotmail.com.

… We’re losing a lot of old-timers in business, sadly. The latest is Chez Paul, which has been a “must” in Olowalu for over 40 years — the finest cuisine. Understand Chef PATRICK CALLAREC has moved to Bali — our loss, Bali’s gain…

… and Roy’s Bar & Grill in Kihei has closed its doors — another restaurant with fine cuisine…

… REGIS PHILBIN of “Live with Regis and Kelly” was spotted having lunch at Pacific’O restaurant in Lahaina on Sunday, Aug. 30…

… and LAHAINA PUBLIC LIBRARY survived the latest state library purge — some cutbacks and temporary closures, but it will remain open. Why can’t the state think outside of the box? Try bringing in part-time volunteers. I’ll guarantee there are retired librarians in West Maui who would volunteer a few hours each week to ensure the library stays open. If the BOARD OF EDUCATION can use substitute teachers, why can’t the library?…

… and the phone “surveys” become weirder and weirder — yesterday I received a call: “We are conducting a survey on fishing. First of all, how many people are in your household?” “What’s that got to do with fishing?” I asked. Pause… “Thank you for your time in this survey.” Click — and they were gone!!!…

… and our wowser County Council members who voted to enforce an alcohol ban at Charley Young Beach should be ashamed of themselves. Instead of attacking the problem and solving it, they took the easy way out and denied the pleasure of a beer with lunch or a glass of wine at sunset to everyone who uses the beach. This ineffective council treats the public like children! “If you can’t do as we say, we’ll take your toy away from you!”…

… and over the pond, the healthcare bill is being taken over by the dilemma in Afghanistan — it seems that military leaders, one by one, are declaring the futility of fighting there, and we wonder who is listening as the death and injury toll keeps growing daily. We have been fighting there for eight years and haven’t made a dent. What infrastructure we have accomplished has been a waste of time and lives as it becomes destroyed. And the civilian companies that have been employed there have given us a black eye. Let’s get done with it already!!!…

… and back on the home front, the cruise ships WILL begin showing up, and the seniors and LahainaTown Action Committee volunteers will be on standby while they apply for a small grant to cover the costs of music and welcoming festivities at Lahaina Harbor. God bless the seniors — and the volunteers!…

… and even though it wasn’t a win for the Lunas, the “Redo the Imu” football event at Lahainaluna High School was a great success, with the town joining in the decorations. LahainaTown Action Committee put up red flags along Front Street — only problem was they had a hard time finding someone to take them down. How about some clever soul stepping up to the plate and offering to set up a small group of eager young people, who would be on call to help put up town flags about four times a year, then take them down. Call LAC at 667-9175. Mahalo nui loa!!…

Up Front Lahaina is a twice monthly feature. To protect his innocence, the writer chooses to remain anonymous. The views expressed in this column belong to the author, and do not necessarily represent the views of the Lahaina News staff and owners.